Horsepower, efficiency, style -- all important. But none of that matters if you don't get the name right. Who wants to be seen in a Yaris? Or a C-Max? Or a Tiguan?
Who knows how they came up with these sorry monikers -- some epic focus group fail? But automakers have as many misses as hits in the naming game, so here's our picks for the 10 worst names fouling today's car market.
Some are simply too contrived. Others sounds like medical devices or pharmaceuticals. One even makes reference to obscure African nomads that American have never heard of. Are you listening, Volkswagen? (Wonder why sales are down?)
We looked at the names of every model available at auto dealers this year and picked out the 10 most offensive, or simply lame.
With one exception -- Kia's K900 -- we ignored names that are just numbers, letters or both. Import brands seemed to be the quickest to embrace bad names. We only have one vehicle from an American manufacturer on the list, perhaps predictably, it was designed and named in Europe.
Here's our worst 10:
Ford C-Max: Is this a vitamin or hygiene product?
Toyota Yaris: Soviet sister vehicle to Boris? Toyota explains this is a combo of Greek goddess Charis, a symbol of beauty and elegance, and the German expression of agreement, "ya." Budgetmobile Yaris is no symbol of beauty and elegance. It's a symbol of being broke.
Toyota Venza: Toyota tells us that Venza is a combination of "venture" and "Monza," a city in Northern Italy. What this has to do with a vanilla crossover/wagon/whatever sold in the U.S. is not clear.
Nissan Armada: The era of giant, sloppy SUVs is over. The marine reference is, however, appropriate for this hideous wanna-be battleship.
Nissan Murano: Must be a Jewish car forced by the Spanish to become Catholic, as in Marrano.
Hyundai Equus: What disease does this pill cure? Yes, we know it is a genus of mammals that includes horses, asses, and zebras. Which is it, Hyundai?
Hyundai Veloster: We don't think even Hyundai knows what this means.
VW Tiguan: This is actually a mish-mash of the German words for tiger and iguana. And what child didn't dream of growing up to own a Tiger-Iguana?
VW Touareg: Encyclopedia Britannica explains the Touareg are Berber-speaking pastoralists who inhabit parts of Algeria, Lybia, Nigeria and Mali. Many Americans can relate.
Kia K900: Sounds like a dog sled team rather than a $60,000 car.
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